Is social media ruining relationships? Social networks, like Facebook, can have detrimental consequences on relationships, be they a 1-month romance or a 25-year marriage. What makes Facebook so dangerous to couples? Pretty obvious. Users are worried that their significant other are engaging in online relationships with their Facebook “friends.” This lack of trust combined with the possibility that their spouse is having an online affair leads to marital breakdowns and divorce. While I do not know anyone personally who’s relationship ended as a result of Facebook, the story we heard in class a few weeks ago about the man who had two wives and was caught over Facebook grabbed my attention. I decided to do my own research on how Facebook is affecting the divorce rate.

According to ABC news, a third of all divorce filings contained the word ‘Facebook’ in them last year, rising from just 20% three years ago.  In addition, 80% of U.S. divorce attorneys say they’ve seen a rise in the number of cases involving social media. Many of the reasons have to do with spouses developing inappropriate relationships with their Facebook ‘friends’ or speaking nasty things about his or her spouse online. But is social media ending marriages that would have survived if it didn’t exist? Or is it just speeding up the process?

The difference between affairs occurring online as opposed to office romances is that Facebook affairs happen lightning quick. In contrast to office romance or out-of-town romances, which can take months to develop, Facebook affairs can happen with just a click of the mouse. Further, Facebook is different from most social network sites in that it lets people re-connect with exes, or friend a person that they only met once. Thus, Facebook adds temptation to people who never would have risked having an affair. Further, if an affair develops outside of social media, Facebook provides a place that seems safe and comfortable to share information about their affair or let off steam about their current marriage, which raises suspicion to their spouse. As a result, when marriages end, Facebook provides a great source of evidence.

Back to my question that I posed earlier: Is social media ending marriages that would have survived if it didn’t exist? Or is it just speeding up the process? In my opinion, I think it is both. If a marriage is on the rocks, Facebook provides a somewhat safe haven to many people to vent about their problems or start an online affair with a Facebook ‘friend.’ Thus, it does speed up the eventual end to a marriage. However, I also think that Facebook can end marriages to a couple who never though divorce would happen to them. Like I stated earlier, Facebook adds temptation to a person by allowing people to rekindle with old flames, or develop a friendship with someone they just met. This never would happen if Facebook didn’t allow you to become friends with just a click of the mouse. Therefore, I believe Facebook does have to the power to ruin marriages that were going strong.

How to solve the problem? Be careful with your friend requests.